Hey Barbie!

[warning: this article contains spoilers for the Barbie movie

& my opinion.]

The Barbie Movie. Arguably one of the most raved about movies this year. The promotion that this movie had access to was immaculate compared to any other marketing I have seen thus far. Honestly, was there any app or even any street you could be upon without seeing some glimmer of pink with the words "Barbie" sprawled across it. I didn't hate it, yet it felt as though it would be one of those over-hyped movies that ultimately let everyone down. However, this was not the case. Not only was I overcome with surprise in how much this movie surpassed my expectations in it's execution, but it sent me through a spiral of missing girlhood, the emotionally taxing reality of entering womanhood, and a deep longing to call my mom.

There I was, dressed up in my hot pink attire, hair curled, and white heel boots zipped up, ready for a good giggle on my Saturday afternoon. I, along four other friends (also decked out in pink), excitingly walked our way right into the theatres, anxiously awaiting the movie that brought our childhood to life. Exactly as expected, the movie had pop-girlie music, all auras of pink, and obvious nostalgia. The comedic timing, different styles of jokes, as well as the wide range of celebrity cast made for an extremely entertaining and humorous experience. It felt as if the entire theatre would be jaw dropped giggling for the entire movie. It felt that way for the first 25 minutes at least.

As the movie continued, the jokes started to drop into more subliminal, self-deprecating comedy. Jokes that you would often hear your girls making on a night out. A specific one being how Barbie, after her feet going from pointed to flat, walks in heels making the comment, "I would never wear these if my feet were shaped like this." While all of us laughed at the obvious joke, we all acknowledged how true of a statement that really was. Heels are ridiculous for the way actual feet are shaped, yet we all continue to buy into the high heel market. In another scene, as Barbie becomes "human" she hollers at the realization of her thighs beginning to have cellulite. As an audience, we laugh at the reaction the doll has to this transformation as this seemingly feels ridiculous, then soon after realizing that we too often have this same reaction to ourselves.

More and more these jokes would reappear in a sugar-coated form while holding a deeper truth to them. I compared this to how life truly is, often times we make jokes that are seemingly harmless and get the crowd to laugh while simultaneously knowing that we actually mean them (usually against ourselves). While watching the movie, it became very clear to me that this was a message being sent out, meant to be noticed. This caused me to self-reflect on myself and how I speak about myself to others.

Throughout the movie there was an abundance of comedy, perfectly timed and written well. However, I personally had an equivalent number of tears to giggles ratio.

The first time I began to fight with my tear ducts during this movie was as a short montage of a young girl growing up. Starting with her playing Barbies with her mom, up to her donating the box of Barbies pushing past her mom, then into her mom dropping her off at school and completely having a negative change in energy towards themselves and one another. I felt the tear fall down my face, and I realized it was because I so heavily saw myself in that montage. The memories of playing with my own mom, only to grow up and resent those very dolls that brought us so close together. How I took for granted all the time she dropped me off at school in the morning, brushing her off, not realizing that at some point it was the last time she dropped me off at the front gate. Not realizing that I wasn't the only one growing angry and sad with age, but my mom was too.

It was at this point that I realized this movie was going to be much more than a giggle in pink sparkles, I realized that this was going to hit home far harder.

I truly started to lose control of my eye's water supply when Barbie, sitting next to an Elderly woman at a bus stop, looks over and tells her that she is beautiful. I found this scene to be quite lovely and beautiful in itself. In one aspect, it acknowledges that even Barbie, in her world full of perfection and plastic, see's the beauty in a full life and growing old. This demonstrates the beauty in age and growing older, the physical change that comes with it as well. I feel as though this was terribly important to include in this movie, especially currently. As of writing this post, there has been a TikTok trend circling around of young girls using an aging filter to see what they will look like in their old age. Many of these posts are negative, sad, or have some undertone of disgust to them. I find that this is a result of the media putting the ideals of beauty and its connection to youth, the value and worth of being perceived as pretty, the fear it has installed on women for simply getting older. The expectations that have been set with or without intent. Knowing this, I see this scene as truly impactful for many young women, young girls, and even older women who were watching. Many fear the reality of change, and the movie emphasizes how okay that fear is, but they also emphasize that it is still beautiful.

Many sentimental moments in the movie were very obviously designed for women in the audience to relate to and take to heart. The movie not only focuses on Barbies journey of self-acceptance and appreciation for human emotion, but it also phones in on the imbalance of the relationships between Men and Women as well as the relationships between mothers and daughters. It signals in on very strangely similar shared experiences women have endured with men. Almost too well, as if it was taken right out of reality. They weren't subliminal about this either, it was very blunt and right in your face. Which I think was the best part. Harmless, but so true.

The movie uses Ken, Barbies male companion throughout the years, as the most stereotypical male imaginable. There's a straight scene that clearly depicts he learns everything he knows about the "Real World Male" from a short montage of the most "dude bro" clips that could be found online as well as books from a library with titles reading "Men Rule" and "Patriarchy." The very point of this was to create the worst version of "Ken" possible, and they succeeded. From taking Ken in the very beginning as pining for Barbie, a funny character with honestly no ambition other than to be better than the other Ken dolls and grasp Barbie's attention to becoming a condescending jerk who took everything Barbie loved and cared about, all because she rejected his advances. Once again, a familiar parallel for many women in the audience. This specific arc is where I have noticed many men tend to focus on. This is all they see, because it's revolved with the men. Of course they aren't paying any attention to the metaphors about the beauty in growing older, or the unique connections between a mother and her daughter, or the message about how the Barbies support and love one another instead of seeing each other as constant competition. No, they see men portrayed as the dorky side kicks for a rare time in movies, even more so they are arguably portrayed as the villains. Many have taken the stance that the movie is feminist propaganda and overall man hating. Which, if you actually watched the movie and understood it, that is not true at all. Far from what the point of the movie is trying to make. The end of the movie even gives the Ken's a redeeming arch, while still driving home the point that in the real world Men and Women still live in an unfair unbalanced society, but the movie doesn't hate on them. Now, not all of the men I have seen talk about or have talked about this movie with feel this way, but the amount that do is unsettling and gross, though honestly expected.

Ken's arch and the connection between the unbalanced relationships between Men and Women, as well as the emphasis put on the abuse of patriarchy did get my bones burning. Barbies discovery of human interaction, emotion, involvement, and character development also pulled my heart strips. Though the arch that really had me aching for days after watching this movie was the one that involved a mother and a daughter.

There is not much focus on the two early on in the movie, rather they come in at the end. You can see how their relationship has been stained due to the struggles of life in general. The daughter being enraged and struggling growing up a teenage girl in the society that has been created around her, as her mom struggles to find her voice in the same society. This reflects on the generational differences, one generation trying so hard but still afraid and the other so loud that they more often than not get frustrated when others don't understand the severity to how they see fit. The two clash fora majority of the movie, until needing to come together in order to save Barbie. A classic pull for a movie regarding a parent-child arch, right? However, The Barbie Movie does something different. Instead of the child coming to a realization, it's the mom breaking down and coming out of her shell. In a heart to heart with Barbie, the mother ends up giving (arguably) one of the most powerful speeches. One, that while listening to, I began to tear up and breathe heavy. I not only related to it, but I needed to hear it from someone other than myself. I feel as though many others felt that way as well.

Her speech/monologue is as follows:

"It is literally impossible to be a woman. You are so beautiful, and so smart, and it kills me that you don’t think you’re good enough. Like, we have to always be extraordinary, but somehow we’re always doing it wrong.

You have to be thin, but not too thin. And you can never say you want to be thin. You have to say you want to be healthy, but also you have to be thin. You have to have money, but you can’t ask for money because that’s crass. You have to be a boss, but you can’t be mean. You have to lead, but you can’t squash other people’s ideas. You’re supposed to love being a mother, but don’t talk about your kids all the damn time. You have to be a career woman, but also always be looking out for other people. You have to answer for men’s bad behavior, which is insane, but if you point that out, you’re accused of complaining. You’re supposed to stay pretty for men, but not so pretty that you tempt them too much or that you threaten other women because you’re supposed to be a part of the sisterhood. But always stand out and always be grateful. But never forget that the system is rigged. So find a way to acknowledge that but also always be grateful. You have to never get old, never be rude, never show off, never be selfish, never fall down, never fail, never show fear, never get out of line. It’s too hard! It’s too contradictory and nobody gives you a medal or says thank you! And it turns out in fact that not only are you doing everything wrong, but also everything is your fault.

I’m just so tired of watching myself and every single other woman tie herself into knots so that people will like us. And if all of that is also true for a doll just representing women, then I don’t even know."

- America Ferrera, The Barbie Movie (2023)

After this speech is delivered, the movie does a flip and things pick up again. Women are empowered, the Ken's are in harmony, Barbie gets to leave her plastic and chooses to be human with all its pain and perfection, and then there's the mother and the daughter. The two get their relationship repaired through a mutual understanding of one another through the very intense, powerful, and scary delicacy in being a woman.

I know that this movie had many undertones, but I also know that a main focus was on mothers and the daughters, on what it means to be a woman and although it may be so hard somedays, that women are incredible. This movie reminded me how proud I am to be one.

I loved this movie. I adored it, I laughed and cried, took so much to heart while also being so angry at the reality of certain situations. Though, I have never felt more connected to a room full of strangers. At the very end of my first watch of this movie, I sat up from my seat, looked to my right, where my friends were sitting, and I said to them, "I think I need to call my mom." I needed this movie, and there are certaintly others who needed it as well. I needed it from the nostolgic childhood toy that had also been through it all. The one my mother had, the one I had, the one my sister had, the one our future girls and women will have. Barbie.

"We mothers stand still so our daughters can look back to see how far they’ve come." - Ruth, The Barbie Movie (2023)